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This weekend, I have been seriously considering disconnecting or maybe “cleaning house” on my social media accounts. I know, this may seem ironic as I am posting this on social media. Sometimes irony is beautiful and poetic in its own way….
So, I mentioned that I do Bible studies with my daughter, weekly. We decided to try a different place this week, for two reasons.
#1, I don’t like being recognized. I’m not like a celebrity or anything, but people DO recognize me. And when I get recognized, that is when I don’t want to be a customer there anymore. I understand that some stores train their employees to recognize their customers, but that just means that in my case, they will lose me as a customer. If I go into a place, and they say, “hey! How are you doing? Onion bagel with egg and cheddar, right?”, that is my cue to back away and go somewhere else. I don’t want you assuming what I want to eat or drink today! I don’t know, I guess I just prefer anonymity. Or maybe it makes me feel like I come there too often, or maybe I don’t like the thought that I am that predictable. Who knows, the brain is wonky computer, sometimes.
We HAD been going to Chick-fil-a (which was very nice), and last week the manager stopped by our table, said he sees us there often, and gave us some gift cards for a free dessert. He asked us what we were reading, and I told him that we study the Bible together. He seemed impressed and told us that next week, breakfast was on him. So, yeah, we obviously went somewhere else, this week…..
The 2nd reason we ventured elsewhere, was because a friend of mine started working at a coffee shop, close to our house. I figured it’d be nice to stop in and say “hi” to a friend that I haven’t seen in a while.
While sitting there with my daughter, she asked, “What do you keep looking at?”
A little backstory - in my day job, I am a tile setter. I have been a tile setter for almost 20 years. I think that I’m pretty decent at it, and I am now self-employed and receive most of my income from tile installation. There would be times when I would be at a restaurant with my family, and I would excuse myself to use the restroom, and when I came back to the table, my wife would say something like, “I don’t want to hear about the tile in the bathroom”. I find that my eyes are drawn to tile, wherever I go. And I also judge that tile. Sometimes positively, as I am impressed with some things that I run across, but most often I judge negatively. And that is what I was doing, when my daughter noticed that I wasn’t focused on our study.
There was a tile backsplash behind the counter at the coffee shop. And there were some very noticeable (at least to me) areas where the grout was very uneven. You and my daughter would have looked at that backsplash and thought nothing of it, but to me it was a flashing red light going off in my peripheral vision. It was all I could see. I pointed out the area in question, and she said, “yeah, I see what you’re talking about….I guess.”. Which just made me want to go over there and circle the area with giant marker.
Ok, looking at the picture that I couldn’t help taking, I guess it doesn’t look all that bad….
But getting back to my original point, I started looking at how I and we as a society view things.
I did a quick survey of my social media feed. I set it to show “most recent”, and then looked at the previous 8 hours of my feed. I found the results interesting.
50 Negatives.
Either ads (like, “this friend likes “Wal-Mart”, or “we thought you would like this app” or stuff like that), or …
clickbait (this would be the things that look like news articles that have headlines like, “She saw something in a shopping cart, but when she got closer, what she saw brought her to tears . . . .”, and then when you click on it, it is a short, usually anti-climactic end to the story, with about 100,000 ads inserted. It is designed to get you to look at their ads, without realizing that you are doing it, until it is too late.
11 inflammatory posts.
These are either political things, or articles or posts that are written from a biased, targeted view, and the purpose for the post is to purposely anger, divide, or otherwise make someone feel agitated (keywords this week would include “taco trucks”, “classified emails” and “refuse to stand for national anthem”).
24 neutral posts.
Actually, this one was a hard one to judge, because some of these might be in the eyes of the beholder.But I included …
check-ins to restaurants or other establishments with no other purpose but to say “I’m here”
basic unremarkable status updates like, “not feeling it, today”
Inspirational memes.While some I do enjoy (hey, I’m a Christian!I can like reading a Bible verse on a nature background, right?), I understand that others may not.Particularly my atheist friends.I imagine that they are rolling their eyes and scrolling by.Just like I do to the hippie, self-help, positive affirmation quotes on nature backgrounds – They usually say stuff like, “don’t worry about what people say about you.They are just jealous”, or “don’t rent space in your head to people who talk bad about you” and stuff like that.Overall, harmless, but annoying sometimes (and to be fair, I am including the Bible ones, for those who aren’t Christian).
Bragging posts.I am guilty of these myself from time to time, but I think most people aren’t actually interested in your kid’s extra-curricular activities, what diet/workout plan you are currently on, or what you found in the discount bin at Target.You’re just bragging, so you can get ill-gotten “likes”, and you will feel better about yourself.
31 good posts.Like happy news, something funny, or a real accomplishment.Maybe even sharing a poignant moment in their lives, or sharing a helpful blog post (wink, wink) .
As I looked at that, I thought about how much time I spend on social media, yet only 27% of what I look at, I actually enjoy. Conversely, over half (53%) of what I look at, I hate (ads and posts designed to make people angry), and 20% is “meh” to me (meaning don’t hate it or like it. I’m indifferent or bored with it, so I scroll right by it). What am I doing?!
So, it seems, this gives me 2 options: Continue to view Social Media and just scroll by 73% of it, or turn off the spigot.
Hmmm…..turning off the spigot. I’m not a fan of that option, either. I use Social Media to stay in touch. I really do. Those 31 positive posts are why I keep tapping that app on my phone, all day long. I like seeing what my friends are up to. I like being able to pray for my friends when they are in need of prayer and encourage them when they are discouraged. I like to laugh at a funny meme or situation, be happy with a friend’s engagement or accomplishment, reading an interesting article, and I even like wishing folks happy birthday. Heck, while I was writing this, I got an offer from a friend (through Facebook) to help me with the design and logo of my company’s website. I mean those are all great reasons to keep it, right? Besides, I don’t want to be that guy who writes a blog post about how I hate social media and I’m pulling the plug, and then you see me reappear next week or next month. It’s just embarrassing.
So, I think that I will choose the “be the change that I want to see”, option. I will scroll by the ads, the inflammatory posts, and the clickbait. I will strive to be positive for positive’s sake. I want people to look forward to seeing my posts. I want people to see my posts and smile. Or laugh. Or be encouraged. Or just be engaged in a positive way. Believe me, just like that tile backsplash, if you look hard enough, you can always find something to complain about. It is much more difficult, but much more rewarding to find the good in things. To post good things. To post uplifting things. To not start or continue an already inflamed discussion. Now, to put an ironic cap on this post, I’m going to post a Bible verse, but its ok, because it isn’t superimposed on a picture of the Grand Canyon….Find some encouragement in it, and cling to what is good.
Romans 12:9-21
Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.
Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.
Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. On the contrary:
“If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”
Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.